Ten Peeves that Dogs Have

Ten Peeves that Dogs Have
About Humans

1. Blaming your farts on me...
not funny... not funny at all !!!


2. Yelling at me for barking..
I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!


3. Taking me for a walk,
then not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?


4. Any trick that involves
balancing food on my nose...
stop it!


5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.



6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw.
You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo
what a proud moment for the top of the
food chain.


7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip,"
then acting surprised when I freak out
every time we go back!



8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.


9.Dog sweaters.
Hello ???,
Haven't you noticed the fur?


10. How you act disgusted
when I lick myself.
Look, we both know the truth,
you're just jealous.

Clarification on the Flag Issue

The Big Day Out would like to offer the following to clarify its position on “flag banning” at the Sydney show.

Contrary to the reports in the media, it was never our intention to disrespect the symbolism of the Australian or any other flag.

We are not banning the Australian flag but are simply discouraging its use for anti-social purposes at the Big Day Out.

In recent times, there has been an increased incidence of flags brandished aggressively and this has led to increased tension. Our only intention in discouraging this activity at the Big Day Out is to ensure that our patrons are not subjected to this aggressive behaviour.

With all this in mind and the aim to create a happy, peaceful MUSICAL event, organisers would like to request that fans please leave their flags at home.

The Big Day Out is not an Australia Day event, but a music festival showcasing music artists from around the world and aspires to unify people through music.

Unfortunately the media reports yesterday were not quoted accurately and we must thank the participating media for wasting everybody’s time including the Prime Minister John Howard, Premier Morris Iemma, NSW RSL President Don Rowe, Keysar Trad (a confidant of the Mufti Sheik Taj el-Dene Elhilaly) and Burt Lane of the Australian National Flag Association….

Ban the Aussie Flag

This is a national disgrace. In an effort to stem racial tension the Australian Flag has been banned from our next Big Weekend Concert

Video Streaming Portal - NEWS.com.au

Video Streaming Portal - NEWS.com.au

ok i know this one is not hard so no clues 'yet'

 

how about getting a grip on this what is this it's not hard

 

Polished Floor Reflection

Fun with your camera ideas

Photo Assignments
With the onslaught of digital cameras you can now and shoot a couple hundred of pictures in a day without spending a dime. Digital photography is a great way to entertain yourself and improve your photography skills quickly.

Action shots
Be the paparazzi on a member of your family or a friend
Beautiful males or females (whatever you are into)
Candid shots (Just keep shooting till you get a good one)
Discover your own backyard
Dress up
Friends making funny faces
Funny signs
Get out your camera and take pictures of anything that makes you smile.
Great body parts
Happy faces
Have your photo taken with as many strangers as you can possibly befriend in one night
Pets in funny hats, glasses or whatever
Pictures of the people you don't have pictures of
Reflections
Silly poses
Sunrises and sunsets
Take a couch (Or any other inanimate object) and have strangers or your friends at all kinds of stores and landscapes
Tourist in your own town get as many pictures of you by the tourist attractions in your town

Something to do over the weekend maybe

.Put condoms in other peoples' carts and follow them to the checkout and watch their expressions when they discover what was in their cart

.Go to a multiplex cinema and see how many movies you can go to on one ticket before you get kicked out

.Secretly rip out the last page of a book your friend is reading, but leave a note indicating where they can find it. NO DON'T DO THIS LOL

.Sneakily get the eggs from someone's refrigerator and hard-boil them all. Then put them back where you found them.
."Borrow" an ugly ornament from your neighbor's yard - see how long it takes them to notice

.Dress up really weird and walk around the block waving to people you have never seen

.Sit in a large cardboard box on the side of the road with a sign that says, "Why lie? I need a BEER!!"

.Climb into a window display and pose

.Hide in the clothes racks, and when people walk by, or browse at the racks, change your voice and say "buy me", "pick me" or something of that sort

.Hum the "Mission I mpossible" theme loudly in a retail store

Lost Cable

Anyone seen a cable? It's brown, about 1 metre in length and has a small thingy that plugs into the modem at one end and an even bigger plactic thingy on the other end that plugs into my hard drive. Should anyone have seen this single cable then please call Crime Stoppers

c'mon down

Its trying very hard to rain, sadly it's not much.

Have you grown up?

25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "breakup."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next
door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of thebeginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for Ibuprofen and Antacid, Notcondoms
and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going
to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate! them
in stead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?"

Bonus:
26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that
doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends 'cause you know
they'll enjoy it & do.

A half-hearted phoon (get that arm up!!) but at least I saw, I photographed, I blogged. All good.

Crossing back over (I do worry about this man!)

Taunting me from the left-hand-side of the road now....

Beginning to cross the street, right to left, behind two other pedestrians.

Johnno chats to me to the right hand side in front of the Tamworth cam. I dare him, in fact BEG HIM to do a phoon. He claims he did, but I don't know, can't see it. Bugger! *waves madly to Johnno anyway.

Hedge trimming, *bliss

The Tall Man

A big, stern woman with a long grey plait and reading glasses on the end of her nose, her dress hung from her bust like a tent. “Tribulation times are coming!” she cried. “And they’re going to be very hard, brothers and sisters!”

She’d been browsing the web, and now saw the end of the world was nigh. “The returning Lord will come at an unexpected time, but a time with specific observable signs. There are signs all around us: there are murders, there are rapes, there are all kinds of things going on.” Disease, pestilence, famine, floods and earthquakes: I assumed she was talking about Palm Island. But she continued, “We are fortunate in this community because nothing has happened to us yet.”

“Are you serious?” I thought. “Are you insane?”

Read more here.....