Thursday, March 16, 2006

Bachelor Refresher Course

OK Johnno I know it's been awhile so heres a little refresher course for you on the do's and don'ts of being a bachelor.

1: You can eat straight from the can.

2: You can drink milk straight from the carton

3: You can remove the crisper from the fridge and store more beer. "Whats a Crisper?" I hear you ask, its that drawer in the fridge
where your wife kept the vegies.

4: You can use your washing machine like a dirty clothes bin and only when its full turn it on.

5: You can do last nights dishes the next morning or better still when the kitchen sinks full.

6: You can hold on tight to the tv remote.

7: You can wash every other day, personally i wouldn't advice doing that.

8: You can burp and fart, again I wouldn't do that if entertaing guests.

9: You can sensor all your incoming phone calls on your answering machine before deciding whether to answer or not and picking up the receiver.

10: Your allowed to stay up late well after midnight, without hearing the words, " I'm going to bed , you comming"

Notice theres more do's than don't, thats because I couldn't think of any. lol

7 comments:

Johnno said...

1: You can eat straight from the can. DONE

2: You can drink milk straight from the carton SORRY, I DRINK BEER

3: You can remove the crisper from the fridge and store more beer. "Whats a Crisper?" I hear you ask, its that drawer in the fridge
where your wife kept the vegies. BEER IS NOW TRANSFERRED TO CRISPY THINGY

4: You can use your washing machine like a dirty clothes bin and only when its full turn it on. WHATS A WASHING MACHINE

5: You can do last nights dishes the next morning or better still when the kitchen sinks full. WILL JUST KEEP FILLING UP THE DISHWASHER TILL SATURDAY

6: You can hold on tight to the tv remote. OLYMPICS ARE ON...DONT NEED REMOTE, NO CHANNEL CHANGING

7: You can wash every other day, personally i wouldn't advice doing that. NO, I DONT WANT TO DIRTY THE SHOWER, MAY JUST SWIM IN OCEAN

8: You can burp and fart, again I wouldn't do that if entertaing guests. HAVE YOU GOT A CAM SET UP IN MY HOUSE *LOOKS AROUND!

9: You can sensor all your incoming phone calls on your answering machine before deciding whether to answer or not and picking up the receiver. NEVER FOR ME ANYHOW, SO I JUST WONT ANSWER ANY

10: Your allowed to stay up late well after midnight, without hearing the words, " I'm going to bed , you comming" i AM ALWAYS UP AT THAT TIME ANYHOW

THANKS PAUL

Beecham Motors said...

hahha, very clever, both of you! Now JOhnno, go and wipe down the benches and make the bed too, much nicer for when you (eventually) sleep.

Johnno said...

Nah, I just slept(finally) in one of the kids spare beds...they have aircon

Gary said...

I'm a unworthy Bachelor!!! Johnno, your Bachelorhood is almost God like. :D

Anonymous said...

I am a great fan of having the washing machine, microwave, fridge, television, dishwasher,answering machine and bed all in one room. Saves having to leave the room to do anything. (Except shower and toilet but they can go together as well) Unfortunately my wife doesnt understand the efficiency in this and demands to have appliances in different rooms. Women just dont understand the concept of high density living. She is lucky she is such a lovely person or I would trade her in on a rather nice surround sound system I saw the other day. (this is a man only post isnt it????.....'looks around furtively')

Beecham Motors said...

*clears throat, Ahem....

when we wommin batch, we eat lemon cheesecake and wash it down with champers. As you do. Well, as OTHER wimmin do, lol.

Unknown said...

Have you been drinking Patty? You seem to be slurring your speech lol