CYCLONE PROBABILITY
The monsoon trough has become very active to the north of Australia, and there are now two tropical lows that have at least some potential to develop into tropical cyclones over the weekend. One is located over the Coral Sea approximately 500 km to the northeast of Townsville and the other lies across the northeast corner of Arnhem Land in the Northern Territory. The Northern Territory low has the most potential to be declared a cyclone on the weekend and because of its proximity to Darwin presents a significant threat if it further intensifies. The Queensland low is slow moving and this too may reach cyclone strength on the weekend.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
How about some "ASSICONS?"
Here goes:
(_!_) a regular ass
(__!__) a fat ass
(!) a tight ass
(_*_) a sore ass
{_!_} a swishy ass
(_o_) an ass that's been around
(_x_) kiss my ass
(_X_) leave my ass alone
(_zzz_) a tired ass
(_E=mc2_) a smart ass
(_$_) Money coming out of his ass
(_?_) Dumb Ass
(_!_) a regular ass
(__!__) a fat ass
(!) a tight ass
(_*_) a sore ass
{_!_} a swishy ass
(_o_) an ass that's been around
(_x_) kiss my ass
(_X_) leave my ass alone
(_zzz_) a tired ass
(_E=mc2_) a smart ass
(_$_) Money coming out of his ass
(_?_) Dumb Ass
Friday, March 02, 2007
Happy Birthday big brother. RIP.
This is a self portrait of my big brother Chris, who died in a car accident in 1971. Today he would have been 57. Cheers!
2007 Archibald Prize
AUSTRALIA'S most prestigious portrait prize, the Archibald, has been awarded to John Beard for his painting of fellow artist Janet Laurence.Welsh-born Beard painted Laurence in oil and wax on linen.The monochrome portrait of Laurence's head and shoulders, measuring about 1 sq m, won Beard the $35,000 prize.The Archibald, announced at the Art Gallery of NSW, is awarded annually to the painting or "mixed media" artwork judged to be the best Australasian portrait of a man or woman "preferentially distinguished in art, letters, science or politics".
Fly by
What is the best thing about having two engines on a airplane?
Answer: If one engine fails the second will guarantee you get tom the crash site
Thursday, March 01, 2007
A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy cold winter. They both had jobs, and had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally left off one letter in her address and sent the e-mail without noticing his error.
In the mean time: In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been "called home to glory" following a heart attack (died and gone to report in heaven). The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from family and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've arrived!
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.
In the mean time: In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been "called home to glory" following a heart attack (died and gone to report in heaven). The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from family and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've arrived!
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.
A lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband,dressed in a homespun threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and walked timidly without an appointment into the president of
Harvard's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge.
She frowned. "We want to see the president," the man said softly. "He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped. "We'll wait," the lady replied. For hours, the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away.
They didn't. And the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president, even though it was a chore she always regretted to do. "Maybe if they just see you for a few minutes, they'll leave," she told him.
And he sighed in exasperation and nodded. Someone of his importance obviously didn't have the time to spend with them, but he detested gingham dresses and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office. The president, stern-faced with dignity, strutted toward the couple. The lady told him, "We had a son that attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed. And my husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus."
The president wasn't touched, he was shocked. "Madam," he said gruffly. "We can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery".
"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly. "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical plant at Harvard." For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. He could get rid of them now. And the lady turned to her husband and said quietly, "Is that all it costs to start a University? Why don't we just start our own?" Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
And Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established the University that bears their name, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
"You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who can do nothing for them or to them." Malcolm Forbes
Harvard's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Cambridge.
She frowned. "We want to see the president," the man said softly. "He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped. "We'll wait," the lady replied. For hours, the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away.
They didn't. And the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president, even though it was a chore she always regretted to do. "Maybe if they just see you for a few minutes, they'll leave," she told him.
And he sighed in exasperation and nodded. Someone of his importance obviously didn't have the time to spend with them, but he detested gingham dresses and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office. The president, stern-faced with dignity, strutted toward the couple. The lady told him, "We had a son that attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed. And my husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus."
The president wasn't touched, he was shocked. "Madam," he said gruffly. "We can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery".
"Oh, no," the lady explained quickly. "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, then exclaimed, "A building! Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical plant at Harvard." For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. He could get rid of them now. And the lady turned to her husband and said quietly, "Is that all it costs to start a University? Why don't we just start our own?" Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
And Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established the University that bears their name, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
"You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who can do nothing for them or to them." Malcolm Forbes
We'll try that again, should we?
Cyclone expected to form tomorrow
March 01, 2007 05:04pm
A LOW pressure system off the eastern coast of Queensland will become a cyclone tomorrow, forecasters predict.
Senior forecaster with the Bureau of Meteorology (BOM) Craig Mitchell said the system, which is currently in the Coral Sea to the north-east of Mackay, had lost speed today, but should intensify tomorrow. "The development has been slowed over the last 12 hours, but we're still anticipating that development will occur tomorrow with the possibility of a cyclone being named sometime during Friday," he said.
The cyclone will be named Odette if it develops.
Strong winds, big swells and flooding of low-lying coastal areas are expected and residents are being told to prepare.
Earlier this month, Cyclone Nelson – the first cyclone of the season – crossed north Queensland's Gulf of Carpentaria coast but caused little damage before dissipating.
March 01, 2007 05:04pm
A LOW pressure system off the eastern coast of Queensland will become a cyclone tomorrow, forecasters predict.
Senior forecaster with the Bureau of Meteorology (BOM) Craig Mitchell said the system, which is currently in the Coral Sea to the north-east of Mackay, had lost speed today, but should intensify tomorrow. "The development has been slowed over the last 12 hours, but we're still anticipating that development will occur tomorrow with the possibility of a cyclone being named sometime during Friday," he said.
The cyclone will be named Odette if it develops.
Strong winds, big swells and flooding of low-lying coastal areas are expected and residents are being told to prepare.
Earlier this month, Cyclone Nelson – the first cyclone of the season – crossed north Queensland's Gulf of Carpentaria coast but caused little damage before dissipating.
New Pants, yeah baby!
Please note the angle and perspective of this fun photograph, my bum is NOT this big, I repeat, my bum is NOT this big.
*coughing fit
Learning to tie a tie
Five years of private schooling, and Dad still has to do the tie. *slaps head *grins
Cyclone, or not?
Cloud across the south is only causing showers and storms in northern NSW, where the air is still humid and unstable. Thick cloud across the far north in an active monsoon is generating heavy showers. Cloud crossing the southwest with a gusty change is bringing brief showers.In other words, join these two lows (from up north) and let's have us a cyclone baby, yeah!
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Cyclone set to form tonight
February 27, 2007 11:00am
A cyclone forming off Queensland is threatening to cause some serious damage between the Whitsundays and Fraser Island.
The cyclone is expected to form overnight before developing into a severe system, the Bureau of Meteorology says. A low pressure system was today 650km northeast of Mackay and was expected to form into tropical cyclone Odette overnight, forecaster Peter Otto said.
He said it was then expected to form into a severe cyclone – category three or above – by the weekend.
"Track prediction is always difficult with cyclones but at this stage it's expected to head towards the Whitsunday coast then head down south to the Fraser coast eventually, so it could cause quite a few problems as it does so," he said.
"It should be a big system too, compared to other events we've had recently."
Earlier this month Cyclone Nelson – the first cyclone of the season – crossed north Queensland's Gulf of Carpentaria coast but caused little damage before dissipating.
Strong winds, big swells and flooding of low-lying coastal areas is expected and residents are being told to prepare.
AAP
A cyclone forming off Queensland is threatening to cause some serious damage between the Whitsundays and Fraser Island.
The cyclone is expected to form overnight before developing into a severe system, the Bureau of Meteorology says. A low pressure system was today 650km northeast of Mackay and was expected to form into tropical cyclone Odette overnight, forecaster Peter Otto said.
He said it was then expected to form into a severe cyclone – category three or above – by the weekend.
"Track prediction is always difficult with cyclones but at this stage it's expected to head towards the Whitsunday coast then head down south to the Fraser coast eventually, so it could cause quite a few problems as it does so," he said.
"It should be a big system too, compared to other events we've had recently."
Earlier this month Cyclone Nelson – the first cyclone of the season – crossed north Queensland's Gulf of Carpentaria coast but caused little damage before dissipating.
Strong winds, big swells and flooding of low-lying coastal areas is expected and residents are being told to prepare.
AAP
Thanks for the rock 'n' roll Billy
'Crazy' rocker Billy Thorpe dies
AUSTRALIAN rock legend Billy Thorpe has died this morning after suffering a major heart attack overnight.
Thorpe, 60, died in the early hours of the morning after he was rushed to Sydney's St Vincent's Public Hospital at 2am (AEDT), a spokesman has said.
He is survived by his wife Lynne, and daughters Rusty and Lauren. "His family were with him when he passed away," the spokesman has said on Channel 9.
Thorpe's manager Michael Chugg has said the death is a "terrible tragedy", as Thorpe had just finished recording a new album and was very happy after a recent acoustic tour.
Ambulance crews were called to Thorpe's Sydney home shortly after midnight after the star began suffering chest pains.
He was taken to hospital in a serious condition but then went into cardiac arrest and could not be revived.
"He woke at 1am feeling terrible. Shortly after that he had a massive heart attack, the paramedics were called to the house, they worked very hard in hospital," Mr Chugg said on Channel Nine.
Thorpe's former manager Michael Browning, who also handled AC/DC, has said Thorpe was a "genius".
"I don't think there has ever been anyone in Australia that has been able to work the crowd like Billy Thorpe. He was just amazing, an actual genius as a showman."
Rock historian Glenn A. Baker has said Thorpe and his band the Aztecs created Australia's pub music scene.
"It's the one form of music we've done better and more convincingly than any other. This sort of loud, roaring, howling, ferocious, sort of pub-based bluesy rock and roll and Thorpe was that incredibly powerful voice.
"There was something that was just primal about Thorpe's blood-curdling roar."
Former Midnight Oil frontman and now Labor MP Peter Garrett has said Thorpe was an inspiration to a generation of musicians.
"They were loud and proud and very Aussie and when they played at Sunbury (music festival) they got up as a bunch of Aussie blokes and just really did it full frontal."
Prime Minister John Howard said he was saddened at the death of Thorpe, who would be best remembered as a "towering figure of Australian rock and roll".
"Billy Thorpe was an accomplished guitarist with an unmistakable voice.
"Perhaps though his fans will remember him for one thing above all else, the ear-splitting volume of his concerts.
"On behalf of Janette and myself and the Australian Government, I extend my deepest sympathies to Billy's family, friends and fans," he said.
Fellow rocker Normie Rowe has said Thorpe was a "cornerstone" of the local music industry.
Career
Thorpe was born in England but migrated with his family to Brisbane in the 1950s.
He moved to Sydney in 1963 and recorded his first song the next year with his band Billy and the Aztecs.
They went on to perform at sell-out venues across Australia and had a string of hits in the 60s and 70s.
Thorpe was best known for the track Most People I Know (Think That I'm Crazy), released in 1972, which reached No.3 on the national charts.
His music career has spanned five decades and he has also written two autobiographies.
Poking fun at the length of his career, Thorpe released a boxed set in the 1990s titled Lock Up Your Mothers.
He was inducted into the Australian Record Industry Association hall of fame in 1991.
AUSTRALIAN rock legend Billy Thorpe has died this morning after suffering a major heart attack overnight.
Thorpe, 60, died in the early hours of the morning after he was rushed to Sydney's St Vincent's Public Hospital at 2am (AEDT), a spokesman has said.
He is survived by his wife Lynne, and daughters Rusty and Lauren. "His family were with him when he passed away," the spokesman has said on Channel 9.
Thorpe's manager Michael Chugg has said the death is a "terrible tragedy", as Thorpe had just finished recording a new album and was very happy after a recent acoustic tour.
Ambulance crews were called to Thorpe's Sydney home shortly after midnight after the star began suffering chest pains.
He was taken to hospital in a serious condition but then went into cardiac arrest and could not be revived.
"He woke at 1am feeling terrible. Shortly after that he had a massive heart attack, the paramedics were called to the house, they worked very hard in hospital," Mr Chugg said on Channel Nine.
Thorpe's former manager Michael Browning, who also handled AC/DC, has said Thorpe was a "genius".
"I don't think there has ever been anyone in Australia that has been able to work the crowd like Billy Thorpe. He was just amazing, an actual genius as a showman."
Rock historian Glenn A. Baker has said Thorpe and his band the Aztecs created Australia's pub music scene.
"It's the one form of music we've done better and more convincingly than any other. This sort of loud, roaring, howling, ferocious, sort of pub-based bluesy rock and roll and Thorpe was that incredibly powerful voice.
"There was something that was just primal about Thorpe's blood-curdling roar."
Former Midnight Oil frontman and now Labor MP Peter Garrett has said Thorpe was an inspiration to a generation of musicians.
"They were loud and proud and very Aussie and when they played at Sunbury (music festival) they got up as a bunch of Aussie blokes and just really did it full frontal."
Prime Minister John Howard said he was saddened at the death of Thorpe, who would be best remembered as a "towering figure of Australian rock and roll".
"Billy Thorpe was an accomplished guitarist with an unmistakable voice.
"Perhaps though his fans will remember him for one thing above all else, the ear-splitting volume of his concerts.
"On behalf of Janette and myself and the Australian Government, I extend my deepest sympathies to Billy's family, friends and fans," he said.
Fellow rocker Normie Rowe has said Thorpe was a "cornerstone" of the local music industry.
Career
Thorpe was born in England but migrated with his family to Brisbane in the 1950s.
He moved to Sydney in 1963 and recorded his first song the next year with his band Billy and the Aztecs.
They went on to perform at sell-out venues across Australia and had a string of hits in the 60s and 70s.
Thorpe was best known for the track Most People I Know (Think That I'm Crazy), released in 1972, which reached No.3 on the national charts.
His music career has spanned five decades and he has also written two autobiographies.
Poking fun at the length of his career, Thorpe released a boxed set in the 1990s titled Lock Up Your Mothers.
He was inducted into the Australian Record Industry Association hall of fame in 1991.
Cheeky Aussies!
Breathtaking bravado foils speed camera
Reports received a very amusing although naughty e-mail from a spy at the Department of transport this week.
Our mate informs us that four youths from Canberra recently pulled off a trick of breathtaking bravado to gain revenge on a mobile speed-camera van operating in the area.
Three of the group approached the van and distracted the operator's attention by asking a series of questions about how the equipment worked and how many cars the operator would catch in a day.
Meanwhile, the fourth musketeer sneaked to the front of the van and unscrewed its number plate.
"After bidding the van operator goodbye the friends returned home, fixed the number plate to the car and drove through the camera’s radar at high speed — 17 times,” our transport spy writes.
"As a result, the automated billing system issued 17 speeding tickets to itself. Go Aussies!"
Reports received a very amusing although naughty e-mail from a spy at the Department of transport this week.
Our mate informs us that four youths from Canberra recently pulled off a trick of breathtaking bravado to gain revenge on a mobile speed-camera van operating in the area.
Three of the group approached the van and distracted the operator's attention by asking a series of questions about how the equipment worked and how many cars the operator would catch in a day.
Meanwhile, the fourth musketeer sneaked to the front of the van and unscrewed its number plate.
"After bidding the van operator goodbye the friends returned home, fixed the number plate to the car and drove through the camera’s radar at high speed — 17 times,” our transport spy writes.
"As a result, the automated billing system issued 17 speeding tickets to itself. Go Aussies!"
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